If you struggle to make decisions, you usually aren't missing information. What keeps you stuck is the fear of choosing wrong, and it grows the longer you wait.
Two findings help. A review of 50 experiments found that, on average, more options didn't make choosing any harder, but the results varied a lot. So it depends on the situation. And in a large experiment, people who were torn over a big decision got to flip a coin. Those whom the coin told to make a change were happier six months later than those whom the coin told not to.
Pick your approach based on the kind of decision:
- Decide what's good enough before you compare the options.
- Set a deadline for decisions you can undo.
- Try it on a small scale when you can test it.
- Keep a decision journal if you want to get better at choosing.
A first step today: pick a decision you've been putting off and write down the date by which you'll have made it.
If you struggle to make decisions, you usually aren't missing information. You've already read, compared and asked around. What keeps you stuck is the fear of choosing wrong, and it grows the longer you wait, because every day of deliberating makes the decision feel more important. This article covers what research says about too many choices and about big life decisions, and gives you four ways out of overthinking.
More options don't always make it harder
One of psychology's best-known experiments took place in a grocery store. In 2000, Iyengar and Lepper had shoppers taste jam at a table with either 24 or 6 varieties. More people stopped at the big table, but fewer of those who stopped bought anything. The finding grew into a whole idea: too many choices paralyze us.
In 2010, Scheibehenne, Greifeneder and Todd pooled 50 experiments on exactly this question, with just over 5,000 participants. On average, more options made almost no difference at all. But the studies varied a lot. In some, many choices made deciding harder; in others, it got easier; and in some, there was no difference. The researchers couldn't point to any single factor that always leads to overload.
That means "too many choices" isn't the whole explanation when you're stuck. What usually makes it hard is that you don't know what you want, that the options are hard to compare, or that you're afraid you'll regret it. That's where help makes a difference.
Two kinds of decisions
Most of what you deliberate over for a long time can be undone. A new phone can be returned, a new schedule can be changed after a week, a course can be dropped. Decisions like these don't get better with more time. They benefit from being made, so you get to see how things turn out.
Some decisions are hard to undo: moving, quitting your job, ending a relationship. With those, it makes sense to think things through. But even there, there's a trap: staying put just because not choosing feels safer.
What a coin toss revealed
The economist Levitt invited people who couldn't make up their minds about a decision to let a coin toss settle it. The coin said either "make the change" or "don't." The experiment was published in 2021 and included thousands of participants.
Many followed the coin. For big decisions, like quitting a job or ending a relationship, those who got "make the change" were more likely to make a change. Six months later, they were happier than those who got "don't." Levitt's conclusion is that people may be too cautious when facing big decisions.
- Made the change Happier, and more satisfied with the decision.
- Left things as they were No happier for having waited.
If you've deliberated for a long time, you often gain more from choosing than from waiting.
The study has clear limits. The participants sought out the experiment themselves and had already been deliberating for a long time. It says nothing about decisions you haven't weighed yet, and it doesn't mean change is always right. But it argues against waiting just because it feels safe. For what this can look like with work, see change jobs or stay.
Four ways out of overthinking
Decide what's good enough. For you if you compare endlessly. Before you look at the options, write down the two or three things that have to be right. Then pick the first one that meets them, instead of hunting for the best. First step: write three requirements for the decision you've put off the longest.
Set a deadline. For decisions you can undo. Decide how long you get to think it over: fifteen minutes for an everyday matter, a week for something bigger. When time's up, you pick whichever option is closest at hand. First step: write down a date for the decision and tell someone.
Try it on a small scale. For decisions you can test before you commit. Take a trial class, work the new way for a week, live with the new plan for seven days. What you learn from trying can't be figured out by thinking. First step: choose the smallest version of one option and do it this week.
Keep a decision journal. For you if you want to get better at choosing, and it's the most demanding approach. Write down every bigger decision: what you chose, why, and how sure you were. Reread the entry after three months. You'll see how often your worries came true and how often you were right, and the next decision gets easier. First step: write your first entry about a decision you made this week.
There's one simple trick that works with all four. Flip a coin between two options and notice how you feel the moment it lands. Are you relieved or disappointed? Then you often know what you really wanted.
When decision anxiety takes over
Having a hard time choosing now and then is human. But if you can no longer make small decisions, like what to eat or wear, and it comes with worry, low mood or trouble sleeping for several weeks, the indecisiveness may be a sign of something more. In that case, talk to a doctor or health professional. You can read more about worry that won't let go in the guide to Mind.
A first step today: pick a decision you've been putting off and write down the date by which you'll have made it.
This is the understanding and a first step. Atlas is where it becomes a habit. Under Mind, you'll find Empty your head, where you write out the options and the worries so you can see them on paper, and Three breaths, for the moment before you decide. You log what you do and see week by week how it's going. Try Atlas free for 7 days, and cancel whenever you want.