When your thoughts keep you from sleeping, they're often about things that are still waiting: what you need to do tomorrow, what you didn't get to, what you're afraid you'll forget. Your mind tries to keep it all in the air, and that keeps you awake.
A sleep study suggests that writing it down can help. Young adults who wrote a to-do list for five minutes before bed fell asleep on average nine minutes faster than those who wrote about what they had already done. The more detailed the list, the faster they fell asleep. Sleep researchers also recommend getting out of bed when you can't sleep, instead of lying there tossing and turning.
Choose your path based on what's keeping you awake:
- Write tomorrow's list if it's tasks running through your head.
- Give your worries an earlier time slot if it's worry that shows up every night.
- Get up when you can't fall asleep if you lie awake for a long time.
- A fixed wake-up time for two weeks if you want to go further.
A first step tonight: before you turn off the light, spend five minutes writing down everything you need to do in the next few days, in as much detail as you can.
If you've been sleeping badly several nights a week for more than a few weeks, talk to a doctor or other health professional. There are treatments that help.
You're tired, you go to bed, and then it starts. Tomorrow's meeting, the email you didn't send, something you said today. Your thoughts spin and the clock keeps ticking. What keeps you awake is often the stuff that's still waiting, the things you need to do and are afraid you'll forget, and your mind tries to hold on to all of it just in case. This article looks at what a sleep study says about writing it down and what sleep researchers recommend, and gives you four paths to try.
Your mind holds on to what's unfinished
Unfinished things have a pull of their own. They come back again and again, as if your brain were reminding you so you won't lose track of them. During the day you notice it less, because other things take your attention. When you're lying in the dark and nothing else is going on, they're there at full strength.
Trying to push the thoughts away usually doesn't work. Back in 1987, Wegner showed that people who tried not to think about a white bear ended up thinking about it more often than people who had been allowed to think about it freely. What helps is giving your thoughts a place outside your head, so your brain can let go of them. You can read more about thoughts that go round and round in the guide to Mind.
The list that helped people fall asleep faster
In 2018, Scullin and colleagues tested whether it matters what you write before bed. Fifty-seven healthy young adults spent a night in a sleep lab, where the time it took them to fall asleep was measured with electrodes, not just by how the participants felt it went. Before bed, they wrote for five minutes. Half wrote a to-do list for the next few days. The other half wrote about what they had already done.
Those who wrote a to-do list fell asleep after about 16 minutes on average. Those who wrote about what they had done fell asleep after about 25. The more tasks participants listed, and the more detailed they were, the faster they fell asleep.
- To-do list Fell asleep after about 16 minutes.
- What I've already done Fell asleep after about 25 minutes.
What's waiting on paper is something your mind doesn't have to hold.
The study was small and covered a single night with young, healthy people who didn't have sleep problems. It compared two kinds of writing, not writing versus not writing at all. But it points in the same direction as a lot of other research: what you write down, you don't have to carry with you into sleep.
Don't lie there tossing and turning
The second part is about the bed itself. If you lie awake for a long time night after night, your body learns that bed is a place for being awake and thinking. That's why the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, in its 2021 guideline, recommends something called stimulus control: only go to bed when you're sleepy, get up if you can't sleep, use the bed only for sleep and sex, and get up at the same time every morning.
The guideline also says something that surprises a lot of people. General sleep advice about coffee, light, exercise and bedroom temperature isn't enough on its own as treatment for someone who has slept badly for a long time. That advice isn't wrong, but it helps less than changing your actual habits around bed. You can read more about screens and sleep in your phone and your sleep.
Four paths to calmer nights
Write tomorrow's list. For you if your thoughts are about things that need doing. For five minutes before bed, write down everything you need to do in the next few days. Be specific: not "work," but "send the quote to Sara before lunch." Leave the list outside the bedroom. First step: do it tonight.
Give your worries an earlier time slot. For you if you're worrying, not just planning. Set aside fifteen minutes early in the evening to think through what's worrying you, with pen and paper. If the worry comes back in bed, remind yourself that it has its own time tomorrow. How a worry time like this works is explained in the guide to Mind. First step: pick a time tomorrow evening, well before bed.
Get up when you can't fall asleep. For you if you lie awake for a long time. If you haven't fallen asleep after a while, or you feel more and more awake, get up. Sit in another room in dim light and do something calm, without a screen, until you feel sleepy. Then go back to bed. First step: decide tonight where you'll go and what you'll do if you can't sleep, so the decision is already made.
A fixed wake-up time. For you if you want to go further, and this is the most demanding path. Get up at the same time every morning for two weeks, weekends included, no matter how you slept. Skip naps. The first few days can be tiring, but your sleep usually consolidates into the night over time. First step: choose your wake-up time and set the alarm for the whole week.
When sleep doesn't come back
A bad night now and then is normal. If you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep several nights a week, for more than a few weeks, and it's affecting your days, talk to a doctor or other health professional. Long-term sleep problems can be treated, and what the guideline recommends most strongly is cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia. If your thoughts come with anxiety, low mood or thoughts of harming yourself, get help right away. If it's an emergency, call your local emergency number.
A first step tonight: before you turn off the light, spend five minutes writing down everything you need to do in the next few days, in as much detail as you can.
This is the understanding and a first step. Atlas is where it becomes a habit. Under Mind you'll find Empty your head, where you write down whatever is spinning around before you go to bed, and Three breaths, for the moment you turn off the light. You log every evening and see week by week how it's going. Try Atlas free for 7 days, and cancel whenever you like.